Want to talk money? I knowingly participated in the urine analysis gold rush of 2014. We billed insurance companies an average of $3,000 per lab run test, another $500 for specimen collection (one same gendered behavioral health technician, making $12/hour, standing in the room eyeing the patient’s genital of choice). Two tests per patient per week, census never dipping below ten beds. Average stay of one month. Discounts for cash pay. Scholarships available.